so summer is almost over and I've have been having lots of fun over at my moms more then my dad. lots of things have happened in the pasted few weeks . i know I've always said i wanted to live with my dad because i always thought my mom was the bad guy but i have been thinking for a while about where i want to live and i lately i have been wanting to live with my mom. i just cant take the pain anymore, i always cry over at my dads, i feel like i not enough or that my sister and brother are way better then me, I've always faked a smile over here because I'm to scared to tell them my pain because i think ill just get in more trouble, i have no friends over at my dads, he lets me have no privacy, i cant have snap, i cant have tik tok, i cant even add a phone number or even text anyone without him knowing or seeing the texts, but over at my moms i have friends, people i can love, i can talk to my mom about my problems without her thinking I'm not enough, she lets me have snap and tik tok, she cares about me. and trust me i have been think about this for a very LONG time. but when i wanted to tell my dad, it wasn't good. my step mom yelled at me so loud that I'm sure the whole neighborhood could hear, and she got soo close to my face that i felt like i just wanted to die, walk off a building and die. i always feel like I'm not enough or that I'm never wanted but that day showed how much my dad and step mom hated me, I've never felt so much hate even from my own parents. i have split summers so 2 weeks over at my dads, 2 weeks over at my moms and again, so I'm at my dads and a week has gone by, which I'm soooo happy about because i leave on Sunday, so that means i only have to stay at my dads for just a couple more days. then after my 2 weeks are over at my moms i have to go to school after that, which I'm also scared about. so i will keep posting updates and stuff but thanks for listening to my rants :)